My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.
Why do orphans have no parents?
Because it was Batman!
Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.
If Batman is half bat and half human, how was he made?
"He wasn't because you can't f*ck a bat."
I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!
Cause I am Batman!
There is a dark alley Who Do You Call? Batman.
Where would Batman get his freak on at? The Batcave or the bat strip club?
Orphan: "I want to be a superhero."
Me: "You should be Batman."
Also me: *starts laughing* because Batman doesn't have parents...
Orphan: I want to be like Batman.
Orphan worker: You are already like him, honey.
A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.
He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"
Why doesn't Batman have super vision?
His parents died.