Vega jokes

Hey Siri, where is my dad?

Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.

HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen!

Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.

...WhAT-

What do you call a Portuguese who commits a crime in Las Vegas?

Consensual Rapper 7.

You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.

What's black, gold, and red all over?

Tupac in Vegas.

EatDatPussy445, aka Deyione Scott-Wilson Eason, aka Bryant Turman Emerson Moreland, is a pedophile, and he is in Las Vegas right now. Go, go, go, catch him!

What happens when you have a kid with Tourette's and a hair trigger?

The Las Vegas shooting.

Las Vegas has a new 550-foot-tall Ferris wheel, hoping to gain tourists.

What’s already gaining “tourists”? Whores.

What’s red, gold, and blank in Las Vegas?

Tupac