The jokes
What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?
"Just Beat It."
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
Why did the football player go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.
Yo mama so fat, she stepped on the scale and it said a.k.a. "error."
What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?
They usually don’t live to tell the tale.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
It's no surprise Donald Trump moved to Florida. That's where the oranges are.
💪 💪 🏋️♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?
Cum Junkie.
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
What’s the hardest part about being a PEDO?
Fitting in.
My cousin really loves baseball.
He always brags about how many home runs he hit in the minors.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.
What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?
They both don’t work.
The first time riding my bike was a lot like my first time having sex.
It was hot. I was sweaty, but my sister had her hands on my shoulders all the time.
What do orphans and garbage have in common?
They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
What’s the difference between the way you watch porn and I watch porn?
The windows we look through.