The jokes
What to do when you're bored? Punch an orphan in the face. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Me vs. the emo kid: we go to high-five a tree. I get a high five; the emo kid is left hanging.
How do Chinese people name their babies?
They chuck a pan down the stairs.
Bully: You're a loser and fat.
Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.
Look for the Gummy Bear album in stores on November 13th, with lots of music, videos, and extras!
What’s an emo's favorite game?
The emo within.
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you?
None, you are both dead on the inside. Lol.
I'm so poor that they let me buy the entire store! For $0...
Your mum's hairline was so big that Dora the Explorer could not find it.
"I met a girl and she's 28."
"Now I'm the coolest guy in all of 8th grade."
- AJR
I have the biggest balls; you have wobbles.
The man says, "Can you hump me?" So the other boy says, "Bro bro bro bro bro."
You think you guys are funny, but look at your hairline. It be looking like the McDonald's symbol. 😂😂😂😂😭😭💀🤨🍆💦👶🏻😈😈😈😈😈😂😂😂😂😂😂👍😳😳😳😭😭😭😭😭😭🤨
What's the smartest insect? A spelling bee!
Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?
'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.
I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.
I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.
A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"