The jokes
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?
One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture? You need only one nail to hang a picture, unfortunately.
One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.
They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.
Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?
Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.
Yo mama is so fat, when she wore yellow, the kids thought they missed the bus.
Yo mama is so small that when she saw the Titanic, she called it the size of the Netherlands.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, it cracked.
Yo mama is so fat, when she saw the Titanic, she called it small.
Did you hear about the boy who got raped by a group of women in the park whilst jogging? Now there are lots of male joggers in the area.
Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to.
Unless you are in prison.
What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
"Aye, matey."
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
Why does an orphanage have milk?
Because Dad never came back with the milk.
What's the difference between YouTube adverts and orphans?
Most get skipped no matter how interesting they are.
What's the difference between a joke and two dicks?
Women can't take a joke!
What's common between the penis and a Rubik's cube?
Both get hard when we play with them.
What is the difference between a feminist and a knife?
A knife at least has a point.
What's common between a feminist and a knife?
They both stay in the kitchen.
I was asked to design a website for an orphanage, so I decided to design it without the home page.