The jokes
What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.
Q: Why did China take over Tibet? A: Because they china exploit foreign resources and keep it for themselves like bitch ass jerks.
Btw, these are real facts despite the CCP ́s propagandist narratives. #FreeTibet #FreeHongKong #FreeInnerMongolia #FreeUyghers
Q: Why did China take over Tibet? A: Because they china exploit foreign resources.
Btw, these are real facts despite the CCP's propagandist narratives. #FreeTibet #FreeHongKong #FreeInnerMongolia #FreeUyghers
You know how 6 is afraid of 7 because 7 8 9? Well, 10 is afraid because he was in the middle of 9/11.
What did the bus driver say to the lady with one leg?
Hop on.
Why couldn’t the orphan play Xbox? Because there was no home button.
What's written on the bottom of a Belgian swimming pool?
"No smoking."
Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!
What is green and blue?
Grass and the sky.
Why did the girls sit on the clock?
To be on time.
Yo mama's so fat, a man has to bring climbing equipment to kiss her on the cheek.
Why can’t the orphan play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus.
What is the funniest joke of all time?
Your face.
After getting in the White House, D. Trump gets a letter...
...from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:
370HSSV 0773H
All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren't able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.
One of the agents suggests Trump ask for MI6's help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary:
"Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down."
What does a rock and a girl have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute only has one crack, and has to wash it and sell it again.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
1. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
2. What is fast, loud, and crunchy?
A rocket chip!
3. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed!
4. What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield!
5. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?
A: Do these genes make my butt look fat? 💩