I asked a kid why he was so blue.
Didn't realize his parents were choking him out.
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.
This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
[being buried alive]
Murderer: *out of breath* How are you eating the dirt so quickly?
Tesco's slogan is "Every little helps."
Well, their bag did a wonderful job on suffocating my wife.
What do turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
What would you do if you see a guy suffocating from the heat? I would call and dial 911, holy shit!
Chuck Norris once put a plastic bag on his head, and the bag suffocated to death.
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.
