SOS jokes

So there were three baby chickens and two mothers. The first baby said, "Why am I named Calf?"

And the mother said, "I f***ed a cow."

Then the second baby came up to its mother, and it said, "Why am I named B***h?"

And its mom said, "I f***ed a wolf."

And the final baby came to its mother and said, "Why am I named Orphan?" And because its mother wasn't there to see it, this is what I have to say: "Because you are one, you ducking hitch!!"

Why was the computer so good at golf? Because he had a hard drive.

Everybody loves "appreciation." So that's what I named my dick.

I drove past Wendy’s the other day. No other stores were open, so I asked, “Wendy’s openin’ then?”

Yo mama so fat, she the iceberg.

So a kid asks his dad, "Why was I born?"

The dad replies, "I thought that girl was dead!"

Yo mama so fat, Thanos had to snap twice.

Yo mama so short that when she plays mini golf, it's just called golf.

Yo mama so ugly that on Halloween she didn't get candy.

So I made a parody for "Me, Myself, and I." It goes like this: "Me, Myself, and I, I'm gonna drink bleach until I die!"

Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!

Your mom is so stupid, she thought eating ass was cannibalism.

They asked to tell them a joke, so I said no.

There was a wedding so sad that even the cake was in tiers.

Your mama is so fat, she only knows three words: KFC.

Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.

PERSON: I need to go so bad!

TOILET: Long time no pee!!!

Your breath is so hot, it made the Chicago fire!

5+2 = 7

But 4+3 also = 7

So take your own path.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are robbing a bank. The police are soon after them, so they hide in a bunch of barrels.

The police arrive and search the area. They come over to the barrel where the brunette is hiding and kicks it. The brunette says, "Woof."

"Oh, it's just a dog," says the police officer, and then kicks the second barrel where the redhead is hidden. The redhead says, "Meow."

"Oh, it's just a cat," says the officer, then kicks the last barrel where the blonde is hidden. The blonde says, "Potato."