Worst Jokes Ever
Why did Iran, ran?
Iran said, "I ran away!"
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.
What itches a lot?
Syphilis.
What is a lot?
Syphilis.
When is a car not a car?
When it's a house.
When other people tell a joke, 3/3 people laugh.
When I tell a joke, 1/3 people laugh, but 2/3 people stare into my soul.
When you try to close a Google ad because it was covering content, but it was covered by "Ad closed by Google."
What do you call Stephen Hawking on Mars? Mars Rover.
What did the Arch bridge say to the Truss bridge?
"I Truss-ted you!"
What’s a teacher's favorite tree?
A geometry.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she’ll let it goo!
What car do elves drive?
Toy-yodas.
A blind man walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair... and the counter.
Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.
Why do disabled people get picked on so much?
My Llama's cousin sucks at going on vacation.
He just stands there; "I'll pack uhhhh...."
Spongebob is yellow, and he can't drive.
Must be Asian.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she's a woman.
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that, as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month.
Today I saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".