Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a shit? I wanna know how it got the car started!
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
Are you guys alright?
If you answered yes then you are wrong. You are all LEFT. Kill me, hmph.
(This joke was taken from that none funny b*tch on Britain's Got Talent)
Why did Vladimir Putin get bad grades? -- Because he was Russian.
I have good faith in the glue police. They usually stick to their word.
I saw a bicycler flip over a gutter. It was pretty grate.
What do dairy products praise? Cheeseus.
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
I have a son. Her name is Zara.
I also have a dad. Her name is Lydia.
When I get naked in the bathroom... the shower usually gets turned on!
I'm not lazy, I'm just bone tired. I bet that one tickled your funny bone. It sure got me rattled. Don't try to stop me. I've got a skele-ton of these!
Last night, I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
What's the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest?
At least one does something when it is triggered.
What's the difference between a shooter and a bullied autistic kid? It depends on who's shooting.
If I'm the night guard at the Samsung store, does that make me a guardian of the galaxy?
A man tried to attack me with milk and cheese—how dairy!
Wanna hear a dry joke? A desert.
Please don't kill [me].
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.