Worst Jokes Ever

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Why should you care

also acceptable when I saw your face

Crying:
Acceptable at funerals,
at the Grand Canyon,
and when you fail your
CPA exam
TheCorporate Accountant

Heroin Monkey

A black and white cartoon drawing depicting a text written in a diary, describing how Patty got a secret out, and then the person was sent to the vice principal's office. Then, the person heard a bouncing noise, laughter, and giggling, followed by two voices sounding like they were having sex in school. A drawing of a person standing in front of lockers is below the text. Another line of text says, "I opened the door, and oh boy, you'll be surprised about who I saw." A number "2" is at the bottom of the page.

𝗚𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗶𝗯𝗮̈𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗻

The image shows a two-panel comparison of Patrick Star from Spongebob. In the top panel, he's dressed as a scientist, wearing a lab coat and tie, looking intently at a microscope and taking notes, labeled "MOJANG COOKING ON APRIL FOOLS". In the bottom panel, Patrick is wearing a board nailed to his head and trying to use a saw and hammer in a very clumsy way, labeled "MOJANG EVERY OTHER DAY".

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a series of repeated text messages. The first message is "Check out this meme", which is followed by "I saw that earlier". This pattern is repeated several times in a messaging app format with some nesting of message threads.

DAP ME UP

The image shows a conversation between a person and a group of kids who are familiar with Naruto only through TikTok. The bottom of the image has an anime screen capture with the caption "Shall I kill these children?"

Anonymous

Just something wholesome to help you recover from whatever you just saw.

The image is a six-panel cartoon depicting a couple sitting at a desk with a laptop. In the first panel, the woman is asking the man for help. The man then helps her. Then the woman asks him to come closer again. Finally, the man hugs her while she is using her laptop. The text bubbles say: "CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THIS?", "HERE... DONE!", "CAN YOU COME HERE AGAIN?" and "BUT THERE'S NOTHING WRONG."

Heroin Monkey

this convo is crazy

Jake " 3 hours ago
Yes I saw Madi's tits and pussy
amy 3 hours ago
thats cray
Jake " 3 hours ago
amy "
wow jake prolly jerks off to pics of madi
You don't know that
Donut Drawzz 3 hours ago
BUDDY
leo
3 hours ago
Jake "
Yes I saw Madi's tits and pussy
i've seen her face
Donut Drawzz 3 hours ago
U ONLY SAW TITS
Im With Stupid 3 hours ago
wtf....
Donut Drawzz 3 hours ago
CAUSE OF CLEVAGE
amy " 3 hours ago
Jake "

Heroin Monkey

The image shows different flags the poster saw on their morning walk. These 'flags' are traffic signs: the US flag times 7, stop sign times 4, danger do not open sign times 13, biohazard sign times 33, a no entry sign times 18, do not open sign times 9, biohazard sign times 6, and danger of infection times 27. Also shown in the image is a nazi flag.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a puppet of Ernie looking angry holding a long thin object. Below him another puppet, Bert, looks terrified. There is text below the puppets: "This is what happens to snitches!" Ernie suddenly shouted. The last thing Bert ever saw was his own blood spraying across the mirror.

Heroin Monkey

The image contains five Yu-Gi-Oh! trading cards. Four of them are labeled 'Right Arm of the Forbidden One', 'Left Arm of the Forbidden One', 'Right Leg of the Forbidden One', and 'Left Leg of the Forbidden One' respectively. They feature golden limbs of a figure in chains. The fifth card in the center is labeled 'Nick Vujcic' and shows a picture of a man with no limbs.

Wade

The image shows a series of posts. The first post asks, "Remember in college you were making out with Betty from your CompSci class and she put a finger up your butt. So you started questioning your sexual preference?" with a reply, "IT WAS MY FINGER BARRY!". The second post starts with, "Remember when you were jacking off with no clothes on for the first time just to try it out? Remember when your Mom walked by and saw everything, even though you were sure that you had closed the door?" followed by the reply, "It was me, Barry! I opened the door! And don't think for a moment that I didn't see everything too!!". The third post reads, "Remember that wet dream that ruined your favorite cartoon bed spread as a teen?!" with the reply "IT WAS ME, BARRY! I JERKED YOU OFF IN YOUR SLEEP!!"

urfavvirgo

The image shows a split panel, with the top half depicting a person pointing his finger forward with the text "What if you". The top right panel shows an image of heaven with the text "Wanted to go to Heaven". The bottom left panel shows the same person, but this time with his mouth open and finger pointing up with the text "But god said". The bottom right has a longer text asking "is your name amy and are you the smelly Indian who everyone hates because she was so fucking jealous of a guy who literally said he wouldn't online date anymore as soon as he saw your face? is that you?"

M3ME G0D

A woman is looking up with a confused expression. Text above her reads "My brain trying to figure out if it's an actual memory, a movie I saw, or a dream I had."

timmyy

Whoa, Talent

A text message conversation showing someone saying 'I saw you fall in the hall yesterday.' The other person responds, 'I didn't fall, I attacked the floor' followed by 'Backwards???' and then 'I'm freaking talented.'

User 👍

😂

A four-panel image featuring Dolores Umbridge and Severus Snape from the Harry Potter movies. In the first panel, Umbridge asks Snape, "What do you want, Severus?" In the second panel, Snape says, "I wanted to say something..." In the third panel, Umbridge replies, "Well, go ahead..." In the final panel, Snape says, "Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thought Voldemort was ugly, then I saw you..."

blach66

The image is a combination of an online video thumbnail and a game pop up. The top of the image features the text 'Wow, that explains a lot'. Below that is the Youtube video thumbnail '1,000 Blind People See For The First Time' by MrBeast. Below the thumbnail is a video game popup with the text 'Real slick. The blind man saw you and ran off!' Also, there is some more text from the video game about the character's life.

PurplePanda

When I tell my bf I saw him fall yesterday.

A screenshot of a text message conversation. One person says "I saw you fall in the hall yesterday ;)". The other person responds, "I dint fall I attacked the floor". The first person replies, "Backwards???" And the second person replies "Im freaking talented."

Anonymous

Saw this little gem online and decided to share it

The image is divided into four squares. The top left square contains the word "ACOUSTIC" in black handwritten font and the word "cancer" underneath in smaller black handwritten font. The top right square shows an image of a cigarette. The bottom left square contains the word "ELECTRIC" in black handwritten font and the word "cancer" underneath in smaller black handwritten font. The bottom right square shows a picture of a Juul.

Bozo

pov: he saw your search history

A yellow minion with wide eyes and an open mouth looks shocked.

Cahyani Ambara

When I saw this, I couldn’t stop laughing

A screenshot of a comment section. The first comment by Rukulukukukupoopoo says: "I love your wife." The second comment is from George W. Bush and says: "So you're the one I've seen in my garden recently..."

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