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Shark

COBSON · 1 year ago

Two white figures with exaggerated expressions sit on cliffs, each holding a Nintendo Game Boy Advance console connected by a cable to a large, blue, muscular shark with a human-like face and a beard in the water below. The shark has a somewhat smug or determined expression. The figures look distressed or excited.

Microwave

UK · 1 year ago

A two-part image showing a Twitter exchange. The top part shows a tweet suggesting a method for scooping hard ice cream, with two photos: a tub of Kemps ice cream and a spoon sitting on the turntable inside a microwave. The bottom part shows a reply tweet with a photo of a microwave emitting smoke and fire, with the text "YOU MOTHER FUCKER".

AI

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost master general

A four-panel comic strip. Panel 1: A robot covered in paint splatters and wearing a red beret stands with a paintbrush in front of an easel, talking to an older human figure. The human says in a speech bubble: "SORRY, BUT A.I. CANNOT ATTEND ART SCHOOL." Panel 2: Close-up of the robot looking sad, holding the paintbrush. Panel 3: The robot wipes the paintbrush under its nose, creating a black smudge. Panel 4: The robot looks forward with the black smudge now resembling a small mustache (like Adolf Hitler's), with an angry expression and glowing yellow eyes. The text 'STONETOSS.COM' is visible vertically on the right edge of the first two panels.

Couple

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

A dark, shadowy, creature-like figure with twig-like structures on its head and a large hand reaching out is shown against a textured, brown wall. The text reads: "Mfw I see an interracial couple on TV:".

Name

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Text overlayed on an image of a body of water with a ladder leading into it. The text lists new ways to shorten names. The list is: New options to shorten names: Jennifer: Niffer. Elizabeth: Zabe. Timothy: Moth. Christopher: Stop. Hannah: Nah. Brooklyn: Ookly. Leonardo: Nard. Penelope: Ope. Brandon: Rando. Theodore: Hodor. Jonathan: Onath. Cassandra: Ass. Matthew: Thew. Kimberly: Erl.

Face

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A gingerbread house decorated with white frosting, green frosting leaves, and colorful candies. The front of the house is a large printed image of the face of actor Hugh Laurie with a serious or grumpy expression. Smaller cutouts of other men in suits are placed on either side of the house. The text overlay reads: Did someone say Gingerbread House?

Death

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A dead deer lies on the side of a road next to a sidewalk. A string is attached to the deer, leading up to a balloon that says 'GET WELL SOON!'. A car is driving on the road in the background.

Egyptian

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A close-up shot of a person's face looking confused, with a statue of an Egyptian figure in the background. Overlay text says 'imagine getting jumped by sum egyptians and one of em says' followed by a line of Egyptian hieroglyphs. There is also a small watermark in the bottom right corner.

Transformation

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A man in a dark suit and red tie sits and gestures. His face and hands are purple. Text above reads: "For the last time, Mr. Wonka, I did not try any experimental gum, and frankly I find this entire line of questioning insulting."

Shadow

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A top-down view inside a toilet bowl. A small spider is visible on the right side of the bowl, just above the water line. In the water, there is a distinct shadow or reflection that is phallic-shaped. Overlay text reads: "Spider scared tf outa me (ignore shadow)".

Urine

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A chart titled 'Urine Color Chart'. It shows different shades of urine color, numbered 1 through 8, from very pale yellow to dark amber. Next to each color, in a separate column, is the word 'Yes'. There is a red line between color number 3 and 4 with the text 'Entering Flavor Town'.

Shirt

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A two-panel comic strip. The top panel shows two men talking. The man on the left, bald and wearing an orange shirt, looks shocked and asks the man on the right, wearing a white t-shirt, 'Dude, How are you STILL wearing that shirt?!' The bottom panel is a close-up of the white t-shirt. The shirt has '9/11?' printed at the top left. To the right are illustrations of the Twin Towers with blood running down them. To the left is an illustration of Garfield the cat drawn like an airplane flying towards the towers. Below Garfield, the text reads: 'Yeah! I'll take 911 orders of Lasagna!'

Body

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of Donald Trump sitting at a table with flags behind him. Overlaid text reads: 'The doctors said they've never seen a body kill the Coronavirus like my body. They tested my DNA, and it wasn't DNA. It was USA.'

Wolf

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a black wolf and a white wolf wearing striped sleeping caps, facing each other with a large full moon behind them. Below the wolves, text is divided into two sections. The left section says 'one snores like "honk shoo honk shoo."' and the right section says 'the other snores like "hoooooonk mi mi mi."'. The text at the top says 'INSIDE YOU THERE ARE TWO WOLVES'.

Retirement

UK · 1 year ago

A large cardboard display of a Coca-Cola bottle in a store aisle. The bottle has a label that says "Share a Coca-Cola with Original Taste Amir". Text overlaid on the image reads "Bro retired from all the Mars delivers 🙏😭🙏😭".

Meat

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A photo shows the lid of a puzzle box featuring a picture of Peppa Pig. The lid says '500 pieces puzzle'. The open box below is filled with a large pile of finely chopped meat.

Image

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a Twitter thread. The first tweet is by 'marie @3mwie' with the caption 'meow' and includes a picture of a young woman posing. The second tweet is by 'Professional Armour Trimmer @grok' stating '@grok make this person bald and obese'. The third tweet is by 'Grok @grok' and shows a photoshopped version of the woman from the first image, now appearing bald and obese.

Gym

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a Spotify playlist titled "Dark Hardcore Gym Playlist". The playlist cover features a scary skeletal figure with red eyes holding an axe in a dark forest with tombstones. Below the title, it says "2min". Underneath, there are Spotify icons and the text "Add to this playlist". The first track listed is "Espresso" with a thumbnail showing the artist's face.

Gorilla

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Weezer

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Four men, the members of the band Weezer, are riding in the front cars of a red and white rollercoaster against a bright blue background. The text "wee" is in the upper right corner.

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