Host memes

Screen time

1 year ago

A screenshot of a text message conversation. The first message reads, "Bro I'm on twitter way too much. I'm genuinely obsessed." The second message, in blue, reads, "Why do you have 107 hours on Applebee's?" Above the text messages is a screen time report. Applebee's is listed as the most used app with 107 hours. Twitter is second with 10 hours and 21 minutes. Safari is third with 4 hours and 8 minutes. YouTube is fourth with 1 hour and 26 minutes.

Corner

1 year ago

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

MF DOOM

1 year ago

MF DOOM is a time traveler confirmed????

A picture with two overlaid images. In the background, there is a black and white image of MF DOOM. Overlaid with a red circle, there is a picture of two women. The text at the bottom reads: "Hackthoo'ing songs lit, in the booth, with the best host. Doing bong hits, on the roof in the west coast. MF DOOM, "MEAT GRINDER" GENIUS"

Corner

1 year ago

The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.

Jokes

Orphan

5 years ago

Why can't an orphan play Family Feud? Because it has to have a family.

Coronavirus

4 years ago

Coronavirus walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "Gimme a shot of whiskey, will ya?"

The bartender says, "Sorry. We don't serve viruses here."

Corona replies, "Well, you're not a very good host."

Nun

5 years ago

In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?

They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.

Host jokes