Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

Figure Memes

A Star Wars Fan

The image shows a series of black silhouette figures with text labels below each one. The figures are combinations of men and horses, like headless horseman, manless horse, or lesshorse headman.

tabs1528

Just the Fact that this exists

The image shows several boxes of "Skibidi Toilet" toys. The packaging features a cartoon image of a man's head inside a toilet. One box is held in a hand and reads: "SKIBIDI TOILET, MYSTERY COLLECTOR FIGURE, SERIES ONE, 1 FIGURE." Another box reads: "SKIBIDI TOILET, MYSTERY SURPRISE TOILET SERIES ONE". The packaging also includes the text "MYSTERY SURPRISES INSIDE" and "TRY ME" plus warning text. The items are displayed in what looks like a retail store.

ιdᥲtᥱ ˖°𓇼🌊⋆🐚🫧

Say no to smoking !!

A digital drawing of a person with black hair, red eyes, and a cigarette in their mouth. There are two additional images. One in the top left corner of a green worm smoking a cigarette and in the bottom right corner of a similar worm looking creature also smoking a cigarette. The text "Say no to smoking!!" is also present in the image.

big [fire] balls

The image shows a platypus at the top, with the text "On the sixth day, God created the platypus. And God said..." underneath. Below that is an image of a cartoon God giving a thumbs up with the text "let's see the evolutionists try and figure this one out".

Heroin Monkey

The text says "Schrödinger's blowjob?" followed by a description of a hypothetical scenario. It states that while blindfolded one receives the best blowjob ever. The identity of the person is not known and it could be anyone such as Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold or even the fireman's cat. The question asked is if you would take off the blindfold to find out, or just leave it on.

Anonymous

Who are you?

The image shows six figures labeled #1 to #6. The first figure is labeled 'shy', the second 'clown?', the third 'chill', the fourth 'special', the fifth 'cry baby', and the sixth figure has the label 'Actually fucking phyco to the point where you look like you are on drugs'. Each figure is different: The second figure has a colorful hat and the fifth has tears.

♢ Shy Dragon ♢

This definitely works

The image is a drawing with four separate life tips on how to make your friends like you more. First, a person is smiling and has a feather tucked in their collar bone, it says 'do a smile to make yourself look like you are not completely dead inside' and 'hold a feather to let your friend know you are not harmful anymore and it is all in the past.' Second, the same person is wearing a lace glove, it says 'wear a single lace glove to show that you have a delicate touch.' Third, it says 'why not wear an outfit that really shows off your figure'. Fourth, a blonde person is holding a leash attached to a dog. It says 'borrow a dog or a child of your choice so people will want to talk to you more'.

randomone

Finding common ground

A split image from an anime shows two figures shaking hands under banners. The banners say "Whitney Houston" and "George Floyd". Below is a close up of the same handshake with the text "Having no air".

Heroin Monkey

A white Lego skeleton figure is holding a large white cylinder in front of it. The cylinder is positioned to look like a penis.

Heroin Monkey

A cat turns its head in surprise, with a shadowy figure in the background. Text above reads: "What's the wildest place you've masturbated in??" Text below reads: "Turn around."

Heroin Monkey

Heroin Monkey

A hand holds a toy in its packaging. The packaging is for "Avengers Age of Ultron", but inside, there is a figure of Luigi.

help me please im being abused

Kristian‽

OR THIS

A man with a black headband showing an anime symbol poses with several anime figures and a boxed anime character.

Heroin Monkey

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

Heroin Monkey

A photo shows two figures of Spongebob and Patrick that are realistic and somewhat unsettling. Patrick is pink and muscular with a serious expression, wearing green shorts. Spongebob is yellow, with human-like facial features including a wide smile, and a red tie and blue and white striped socks.

Heroin Monkey

A statue of Shrek with a big, cartoonish mustache, and a small girl sitting on a part of his statue also has a big mustache.

Heroin Monkey

A pink, worm-like creature with a human face. The face is that of Dwayne Johnson. It is on a black background.

Heroin Monkey

The image is a screenshot of a 4chan post with green text on a black background. It depicts a dystopian scenario in a future where Hillary Clinton has become a supreme ruler and implemented a series of drastic measures.

Heroin Monkey

A car window decal shows three stick figures in jail, then a female stick figure and nine small stick figures indicating a family.

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