Worst Jokes Ever

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Crush Memes

Anonymous

Shitpost-master general

A can of PetAg KMR Kitten Milk Replacer with the text "*shotguns then proceeds to crush empty can against forehead*" written above it. The can features a picture of a cute white kitten.

A Star Wars Fan

A note asking Katie to go to prom with options "yes" or "definitely yes", followed by a video of three dancing skeletons. The text on the video says "Katie didn't hold back".

Heroin Monkey

A still image from the Muppets. Gonzo, a blue puppet with a large nose and grey hair, is looking at Kermit, a green frog puppet. The text below the image says, "Gonzo uses his psychic powers to crush Kermit's brittle, amphibian body."

Anonymous

The image shows three anime characters sleeping in bed. The top left is a blonde character labeled "Your crush". The top right is a male character labeled "Not you lol". The bottom character is a blue-haired character labeled "You".

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

A large, colorful beach ball, with a man standing next to it. The text below the image reads: "A fun way to ruin a weekend and blow 100 bucks. We took this ball to the beach and after close to 2 hours to pump it up, we pushed it around for about 10 fun filled minutes. That was when the wind picked it up and sent it huddling down the beach at about 40 knots. It destroyed everything in its path. Children screamed in terror at the giant inflatable monster that crushed their sand castles. Grown men were knocked down trying to save their families. The faster we chased it, the faster it rolled. It was like it was mocking us. Eventually, we had to stop running after it because its path of injury and destruction was going to cost us a fortune in legal fees. Rumor has it that it can still be seen stalking innocent families on the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina, so there is something to be said about its durability."

Anonymous

A baseball player at bat next to the text "Man Identifying As 6-Year-Old Crushes Game-Winning Homer In Tee-Ball Championship."

Jazzy💕

A person with their legs up in the air is wearing black shoes. The text above reads, "My crush: Sent a message. Me:".

Anonymous

(Posted by Seth 💖)

The image lists the pros and cons of girls with thick thighs. Pros include that they are extra squishy, super great pillows, look good in skirts, dresses, and shorts, they jiggle, are soft, and could crush a watermelon. The cons are that there are none, because they are perfect.

Anonymous

A woman's face is covered in white fluid. The text says "If a girl gives you this look, it means she might have a crush on you. You can tell by the slight angle of her smile."

Wade

Bro really said “eat shit”

A comic book panel shows Sonic and Knuckles confronting an enemy. Sonic tells Knuckles to secure the Master Emerald to prevent the enemy from using its power. Knuckles questions if Sonic is crazy. The panel shows the enemy attacking, with a sound effect 'SHKOOM'

Wade

The image shows a conversation in a game of Among Us where a blue character accuses a red character of being sus for taking too long to reply. A red character then replies, "Still faster than your crush's reply." Below the chat are four stone figures with shocked facial expressions.

Wade

Bredbear

A meme showing a comparison between "my friends dreams" and "my dreams". "My friend's dreams" shows two Chad figures, with text saying "I dreamed I kissed my crush" and "nice". "My dreams" shows a bunch of bread and characters from "Five Nights at Freddy's" embedded into the bread. There is also text that says "Five Nights at BRreddy's".

🎧Lilly🌟

The image shows Spiderman in a seductive pose on railroad tracks. The text says "When ur crush shows up. Hey girl."

✨Jassy✨

Send the numbers and i will answer honestly

A black and white image titled "ASK THE ADMIN" with the Instagram handle "IN.LOVE.WITH.BOOKSLIG" below it, followed by a list of 50 questions. Each question is numbered. There are heart symbols at the top corners of the image.

𝐋𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧 𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬

My dream:

The image shows a text conversation between "My friend" and an unnamed person and then the description of the unnamed person's dream. The first part of the image says, "My friend: - I had a dream about my crush today! - And you?" The second part of the image shows a close-up of a Black man with wide eyes and his mouth open, wearing a white shirt with red stains. A cat with a grumpy face is visible in the center of the man's chest.

Daddy Cock

SHrek

The image shows a grid of multiple Shrek face close-ups with a checkmark. On the right, a large Shrek image is shown. The text reads "Can I see your phone?" Me: "just a sec" and "ur beauty is ogrewhelming me" and "shrext-posts: Send this to your crush with no context."

DADDY sus aka the king

A Pokemon-like card featuring a person with cat ears, a hat, and pink blush on the cheeks. The card has two actions: "UwU" and "Twerking" with short descriptions.

stillwaiting..

A phone screen shows a text message conversation with the last message reading "My boyfriend", followed by two images of Kermit the frog. The first image is Kermit looking at a phone with a shocked expression. The second image is Kermit laying on the floor and having his chest compressed.

Inessa :)

Me:get glasses me after looking at my crush

An animated pink character with bulging red eyes and smoke coming out of them, with the text "MY EYES" overlaid on the image.

Inessa :)

The image shows two parts. The top part is a screenshot of a text message conversation between 'My Crush' and another person. 'My Crush' asks three questions: What is the missing vowel? A, E, ?, O, U, What is the opposite of hate? and What is the opposite of me? The answers received are I, Love, and My boyfriend, respectively. Below the screenshot are two pictures of the Kermit the Frog. In the first picture, Kermit is looking at the phone. In the second one Kermit is on the floor with hands on his chest in a painful position.

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