Joe

Joe Jokes

Man

Two men are sitting at a coffee table.

Mike: "I think I might have a drinking problem."

Joe: "Why do you say that?"

Mike: "Well, last week I got so drunk I blew chunks."

Joe: "That's nothing to be ashamed of; we all drink a little too much sometimes."

Mike: "No, you don't understand. Chunks is my dog's name."

Joe Biden

Government Briefing:

Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today...

...He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.

Difference

What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?

They both talk like they're on fent.

Joe Biden

If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.

Joe Biden

Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"

Donald Trump

Donald Trump secretly admires Joe Biden. How do I know?

He attempts to imitate "Sleepy Joe" by falling asleep during his court cases and during part of the Republican National Convention!

Woman

Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.

Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"

America

If Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden are in a boat and it capsizes, who survives? America.

Joe Biden

You know how Joe Biden is happy?

When he is rubbing a little girls' shoulders and eating ice cream.

Trip

Did you hear that Joe contracted Sugondese Ligma on his trip to Suggon, and now he won’t be able to make it to Saw Con?

War

Why did Joe Biden pull out of the Afghanistan war?

Because it was over 18 years old.

Joe mama

Joe mama so fat when she went to the movies, she sat next to everybody.

Joe mama so fat when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time, please."

Joe mama so fat when she stepped on the scale, it said, "To be continued."

Leaf

Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?

Ben: I don't know.

Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.

Joe mama

Joe mama so fat when she got sturdy, she tripped on her shoelaces, fell on her face, and fell down 2 floors.

Mama

Joe mama so fat, when she did the IShowSpeed dance, she fell five floors down.