James Bond jokes
James Bond walks into a saloon where Michael J. Fox is tending bar. He says, "I’ll have a martini, shaken, not stirred."
Michael turns to him and says, "How else would I serve it?"
If James Bond is the most famous spy, wouldn't that also make him the worst spy?
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
What's a whale's favorite James Bond movie? "License to Krill."
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
James Bond gives all the ladies he's met the perfect birthday gift: Chlamydia.
What do you call a scared octopus?
A octopussy.
Octopussy.
Octopussy.