Howe jokes
How do you scare a bee?
Boo-bee!
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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
102, if you have some alive ones.
How do make an adult cry?
Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
I don't know, either. It depends on how hard you throw them.
How do you get ten babies in a bowl?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
Doritos.
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"
Me: I finished a book with 100 pages.
Someone else: How was it?
Me: It's a long story.
How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz.
How are guys and tile floors alike?
If you lay them right the first time you can walk all over them for years.
How do you get an emo out of a tree? You cut the rope.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
One, if you throw it hard enough.
How do you make a pink Smurf?
You peel the skin off.
- What did the skeleton say to his friend?
- Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...
This guy is boiling water. The girl walks in and says, “What are you doing?” The guy says, “I’m making Holy Water.” She said, “How?” He said, “I’m boiling the hell out of it.”
Son: Dad, do you remember your first blowjob?
Dad: Ohhh yeah, I do!
Son: How did it taste?
Dad: Get out.
I like my bread how I like my wife: cold and stiff.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His power went out.
Did you hear how Stephen Hawking died? He lost WiFi connection.