Why are most vacuums gay?
They’re always coming out of the closet.
I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.
Okay, so turns out the toasters are not waterproof...
Dentist: Open up, sir.
Me: So... I hate my life, my family, my sisters, my dog, my cat, and I tried to take a bath with my toaster, but my dog took it. That's why I hate my dog. And my cat died trying to chew my rope; it choked... Yea.
Dentist: I... meant your mouth... so I can clean your teeth.
Me: :O Ohhhh, my bad.
Dentist: Do you need help??
Me: Yep.
Dentist: ...
Me: ....
I got a toaster for my birthday and said, "Yay, new bath bomb!"
I sold my vacuum the other day.
All I got was dust and my mom's wig.
Q: What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?
A: You slap her.
Hey, I just found out my toaster is waterproof! :D
The Toaster: The best bath bomb!
The toaster;
otherwise known as, the ultimate bath bomb.
So I asked my mom for a bath bomb, she just gave me a toaster.
Where do you buy a dishwasher?
Hot singles in your area.
Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?
Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.
What's the difference between a woman and a washing machine? The washing machine doesn't follow you after you put a load in it.
What do you call a midget that waves? A microwave.
I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday.
I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
Do you want to buy my Hoover?
I mean... it's just collecting dust.
The Toaster, otherwise known as the ultimate bath bomb.
whats black and screams stevie wonder answering the iron
