Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
Hes Jokes
Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?
A: Eat my dust.
A child's parents once lived in Chicago.
I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.
What if Hitler did not say "bombs away," he said "lambs are slayed?"
Why didn't the skeleton follow his dreams? He was too gutless.
Why didn’t the construction worker build a bridge?
He was scared to get across.
I always loved going to Bill Cosby's house; he always greeted me when I woke up with "Rapey-rapey, eggs and bakey."
I saw a cyclist in the road today, so I ran over him and he said in a robotic voice, "SHUTTING DOWN!"
Sailors are coming onto the boardwalk and are met by Colonel Sanders. He asks them, "What is your occupation?" They respond, "We are seamen." So he says, "Well, you better wash up 'cause I'm finger lickin' good!"
I put my fish on a leash so I could teach him to walk. Then I took him out for a walk. Then, when I put him back in the tank, he stopped moving.
Why did the pony have to gargle? Maybe because he was feeling a little hoarse.
Why is 7 afraid of 8?
Because 8 ate 9, 10, 11!
There was a dude, he was like, "Yo dawg, you wanna die?" I said, "What is this, Friday the 13th?"
Why did the cow cross the road?
To prove he wasn't a chicken.
Stephen Hawking couldn't drink anything.
He'd break if he did.
I bought these trainers from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced it with, but I have been trippin' all day.
Why did the person peel his skin off? Because he wanted to.
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he.
What did the man say when he knocked down the bookshelf?
Looks like I've only got myself to blame...
Why is Stephen Hawking so square headed? Because he forgot to shut Minecraft down!
