Hes

Hes jokes

Sally

A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?

B: Why?

A: Because she has no arms.

Knock, knock.

B: Who's there?

A: Not Sally.

Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?

B: I don't know, why?

A: Because Sally was driving the car.

Insult

My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.

Crash

Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?

Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...

Memes

Kid

I saw one kid in a game. He went, "I love you, tree!" He was dumb as cant tell, sorry.

Sign

An African man was walking in New York when he saw a sign that said, "Watch out for children."

He started laughing hysterically, then a white man asked him, "Why are you laughing?"

He said, "In Africa, they would never put up a sign like that."

Stephen

If I tell Stephen about these jokes, what is he gonna do? Chase after me? He better run fast!

Dad

My dad owns a countertop store and sometimes he'll barter.

A lot of the time he will take things for granite.

A lot of counter-offers were made.

Milk

Did your dad ever tell you he was going to get milk... But then never came back lol? 😅

Sex

Why did God create sex for marriage?

Because he wanted more people and less fun.

Dog

Why didn't the dog want to play football??

'Cause he was a boxer!

Relationship

Dad: Are you gay?

Kid: Yes.

10 days later.

Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.

Dad: I thought you were gay?

Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.

Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.

Squirrel

How come Mr. Squirrel watches porn sometimes?

Sometimes he feels like a nut, sometimes he don't.

Trash

I went to take out the trash, could not find you, so I went back in. The next day I found you.

Friend

My Emo friend was coming over to my house. When he got there, he said, "Got a rope?" I asked why, and he said, "I want to make a swing."

Milk

The reason your dad never came back with the milk is 'cause he ran 88 mph downhill.