Hes jokes
So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."
Yo mama so fat that when she saw Thanos and he tried to snap her out of existence, it didn't work, and he said, "Man, I quit!"
Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To show he had guts.
Why did the other hedgehog cross the road? To see his flat mate.
Met the emo kid today; he was pretty chill; he was just hanging out.
Wow, he stole my antidepressant toy. The next day, he was on the ground.
Memes
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
Why was the Pakistani bomber angry? Since he got a pepperoni instead of a plain [pizza].
I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.
He never came back the next day, says the local news.
Your hairline's so bad, your dad went to get the milk and never came back. Years later, he comes back and says, "Go get a hairline, boy."
Why did the terrorist not go undercover?
Because he blew it!
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
Why did the orphan go to rob the bank? Because he wanted to be wanted! >:D
A man is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door.
He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there's a knock at the door.
He opens it and sees the same snail.
The snail says, "What was that all about?"
Why did the blind man cross the road?
Don't ask me, he can't even see where he's going.
Why is the blind man so close to the door?
He can't see it.
My friend is an emo. I asked why he wears black. He said, "Black like my soul." I just walked away.
Dentist said I grind in my sleep... he a real one for that.
Why is 10 so scared? Because he is right in the middle of 9/11.
What does Finn Wolfhard do when he makes a good joke?
He drops the Mike.
A handicapped person tells a good joke, but he can't be a stand up comedian.