Hes jokes
Why did he go to the chiropractors?
To get his spine fixed.
Why did the teacher yell at the orphan?
Because he didn’t do his homework.
Why was the orphan eating cereal with water? Because he has no dad to bring him milk.
My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)
I met a gay guy last night.
Man, was he a pain in the ass.
Memes
I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"
Why was the chicken screaming?
He had an egg stuck in his butt.
Man, my brother has a tight, buttered butthole. The veins in my cock throb when he comes over!
Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.
This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.
Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.
Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.
He still is a kid.
How does Moses make his tea?
He Brews!!!
So last week I gave my blind friend a cheese grater. The next two weeks he told me that was the most violent book he has ever read.
You know Thomas Paine, right? Well, clearly he had some common sense too, right?
Stevie Wonder is a terrible father.
He never sees his kids.
How did the man in prison escape?
He drew a bum on the wall and slid through the crack.
Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?
Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.