When I went to see the doctor, he remarked that he hadn't seen me in a while.
I said that I have been ill.
Hes Jokes
Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?
Yeah, he Pasta-Way.
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor!"
Why couldn't the carrot go to his friend's house?
Because he was grounded.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
He got hit!
What did the skeleton play when he joined the band?
A tromBONE.
What did the stop sign say to the street sign when he couldn't read a map?
"Can you give me some pointers?"
Stephen Hawking died because he tried downloading a free version of Windows 10.
Why couldn’t the guy make bubbles?
He couldn’t find the right solution.
My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. He said, "Get your paws off my toy!"
Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?
Rip Van Tinkle.
Q: A guy walks into a bar, what does he say?
A: Ow!
Why does Waldo wear stripes?
He doesn't want to be spotted.
Does your cat scratch you?
Yeah, I need [to] give him payback, but now he won't respond.
Did you hear about the man who backed into a meat grinder?
I guess you could say... he was a little behind on his work.
Why couldn't the T-rex clap his hands?
Because he's dead.
What did the melon say to the avocado when he proposed?
Can't elope.
Why is daonlyjuanhere an orphan?
Because he is the only one.
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the side that he was not on.
