Hes jokes

Why did the chief go to jail?

Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!

My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don’t even care.

Why does an orphan like church so much? So he can call someone "father."

I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes.

He hugged me!

Do you ever wonder why Michael from Halloween likes his mask so much? It's because he ad-Myers it.

Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."

I beat up a deaf kid the other day. I had to. He kept throwing up gang signs.

I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.

We shouldn't joke about major tragedies. My dad died in 9/11, he was Saudi Arabia's best pilot.

I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home.

So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.

What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!

One day I was walking next to a home less man and he was eating grass I asked him if he was hungry he said yes I said follow me you should of seen his face when I showed him my back yard 😂😂😂😂

Hello! Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken!

Yesterday I saw an orphan kid playing GTA and told him he can't get 5 stars because he ain't wanted.

"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.

Why did the orphan become gay? Because he wanted to call someone "daddy."

"Hitler wasn't such a bad guy, after all, he did kill Hitler."

Me and my friend are walking, we see a kid. My friend asks him why he's crying and if he lost his parents. He said, "Yeah." I slapped my friend because we were at an orphanage.

Bro sat down too close for comfort. I told him to move or he would get hurt.

Come on, how hard could it possibly be To move a few inches? You’re touching my D.

A guy really needs his personal space. Disobey and I’ll shove it in your face.