Hes jokes

Why can’t you take a Black Asian guy golfing? Because he can’t drive and can’t find his own balls.

I went to see my doctor today and I asked him how come every time I have sex my eyes hurt.

He said that’s a common reaction to pepper spray.

Stephen Hawking is better than NASA. They study black holes that are 8 billion years old, while he was down here on Earth staring at 14-year-old black holes. 😈😈😈

Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.

What did God say when he made the first woman?

"Where is your dick at?"

After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music?

Because he had a ton of sick beets.

I told my brother if he wanted to have a wonderful first day of school, then he should put a cookbook in the women's sports section at the school library.

Why did the Invisible Man turn down a job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it.

Did you know Paul Walker was a method actor? He took his role very seriously as a human torch.

Where can a gay male that is abled bodied find the location of a glory hole if he is looking for a free and anonymous blowjob from another gay male?

From a physically disabled gay male who is either at the gym 💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ or at the rest area ♿️ 🚹 🚽.

If you give a man a plane ticket, he will fly for a couple of hours, but if you push a man out of a plane, he will fly for the rest of his life :)

Why did God create women before men?

He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.

I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.

Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?

Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.

That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.

Jesus was drinking when he made you.

He said he like Neymar so HIT THAT BOY LIKE FROM THE BACK!

I like Christmas.

It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁

A guy asks his priest friend what he wants to eat, and the priest says "bad boys." Then his friend asks, "What kebab do you want?" and the priest says, "B Bricked up Caucasian or Asian will do."

I would have a joke for my friend... but he can't afford the punchline.

Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.