Hes jokes

What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?

He wipes his butt.

Why did he die? He forgot to get a new GPU for his new PC.

Timmy had 66 toys. He said it was "2 many (662)," so he gave them to Mr. Divide. He gave 21. Equals flip it over! It’s weird.

My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?

What did the fat guy say when he fell off the ladder? "Catch me!"

I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.

Why did the lonely fish get a detention? Because he left the school.

An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."

Why is Ronnie Anne in love with Lincoln? Because he has a fat nugen.

Mr. Smith lived in an apartment. In the apartment, he went to the elevator and went to the 16th floor. Then he went to the 21st floor by 5 stairs every morning. Why did he do that?

Because he was too short! So he pressed the highest button he could and walked to his apartment.

A man walks into a bar.

He had to have 13 stitches!

My friend came over to my house. He asked where my girlfriend was, and I told him she is in the garden.

He said, "That's weird, I didn't see her." I said, "You have to dig a little."

Do you know why Daddy never comes back to get the milk? Because he’s the milkman.

I'm really bored and I don't know what's up with Prince. He isn't talking to me.

And Freshfry, why are you so mean now?

"Bill? Bill?" Bill hears faintly in the distance.

Bill Nye snapped back into reality only to find he had peed all over the set.

My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.

I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?

Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?

Because he has ALL of the booty!

What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?

Nothing because he's dead.

Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.

Why did the orphan join the baseball team?

Because he knew when he got to third base he could head home.