Hes jokes
A man is digging in his garden and finds a gold chest. He goes to tell his wife.
Then he remembers why he was digging in the garden...
What present did the armless kid get for Christmas?
He got gloves. Ohh, sorry, he could never open the present.
I think my dad's gay because he goes out with his mates to get milk but never returns.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
My dad died in the 9/11 attack. He was a good pilot.
If Hitler was a comedian, he would use laughing gas.
What do you do if your online friend wants to commit suicide? You can't do anything, he's already on line.
Why did the orphan rob the bank? Because he wanted to know what it felt like to be wanted.
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
My grandpa died in 9/11. He crashed a plane.
What did the cat say when he took his new car for a test drive?
"Meoooow!"
Question: What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Answer: Dam.
I asked my orphan friend to come to my house. He said he was confused because he didn't know what that is.
My Dad said he got me from the shops, and I remembered what Grandpa said about him.
Why do orphans hate Dom Toretto?
Because they hate how he cares about family.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.
I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What did the orphan's parent say when he got bad grades?
Nothing, he doesn't have any.
Little Johnny was late to class. The teacher asked him where he was. Little Johnny said, "I was on top of Marry Hill." Then a kid comes late to class and also said he was on Marry Hill. Then a little girl that's about 4 or 5 comes in. The teacher asks, "Who are you?" She said, "I'M MARRY HILL!"
Why did the student cannibal rush to the cafeteria?
He wanted to eat ahead of the others.
What do you call Tarzan when he swings through the trees backwards?
Nazrat.