I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder. The ungrateful brat. I see why he is a orphan
What did the weed say before he got on the escalator?
So, a bus crashes, killing everyone on the bus, and God feels so bad that He gives each one a wish.
The first person comes up, and she wants to be beautiful, so God makes her beautiful, and she goes into Heaven. The next person comes up, and he says, "I want to be beautiful as well." As this goes on, the last man in the back begins laughing a little, everyone becoming beautiful, until God asked the last person what they want, and he said, "I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again!" So God had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted.
I took my son to a driver's school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive a car because he ran over my ex on "accident."
(I gotta go pay him out of jail!)
A skeleton decided to become an assassin.
He was always skull-king around!
Scratches on an icy road and kills 50 people on the bus, and when they get to Heaven, God feels so bad for them and grants them all one wish.
The first lady in the line was always worried about her looks, so she wished to be beautiful, and the guy behind her couldnât think of what to wish about, so he also wished to be beautiful. This kept on going, but the guy at the end of the line started to laugh. When he got to God, God says, âWhat is your one wish, my son?â He said, âI wish you can make them all ugly again.â
why does the orphan like nature, he can call someone mother
why does a orphan like church so much, so he ca call someone father
Why did the Lego cross the road? He was on the wrong block!
my dad died in the attacks he was the best pilot pakistan has ever seen allahwakbar
My dad died in the attacks. He was the best pilot for Pakistan.
i don't joke about 9/11 because i lost my dad he was the best pilot i ever knew
I saw a kid on the curb while I was on a walk, and he was in baggy clothes, and I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "Yeah." And the orphan said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Ur parents."
Why could the orphan never be gay Because he had nobody to call daddy
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.
Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."
Why did God create sex for marriage?
Because he wanted more people and less fun.
Her husband prepares them a romantic dinner. The wife tells her husband about her desire for it. The husband was clueless about such acts. So, the wife tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay underneath her naked in the reverse missionary position.
She starts thrusting with his meat inside of her and starts waiting for him to thrust along with her thrusts. However, the husband didnât know what to do, so he just laid there. Suddenly the wife had an urge to pee, but held it in because her husbandâs joystick was right inside her. She loses control after a while and lets one drip out. The wife apologizes profusely and continues thrusting her husband. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another drip of urine run down the husbandâs schlong to his pelvis.
The husband throws the wife from the couch, gets up, and says,
"Honey, if you think Iâll be screwed by you for more of that, youâre out of your mind."
I wish we could implant all parts because I could have used some car parts from Stephen Hawking after he died.
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says, "If I can surprise you, I get a free drink." The bartender was unsure but agreed.
The guy pulled a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket, and he starts to play.
The bartender was surprised and gave the guy a free drink.
The guy then says, "You see, I have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes. Can I get another free drink if you get a free wish?"
The bartender agrees without hesitation.
The bartender wishes for 1000 bucks, but he gets 1000 ducks.
"WTF!" the man shouts.
The guy answered, "Did you think I wanted a 30cm long pianist?"
My grief counselor died. He was so good, I donât even care.
