Went to the doctor, told him I've been having dreams, first about a wigwam, then about a teepee. He said I was too tense.
Hes Jokes
Why did the Roman not eat BBQ chicken?
Because he "wasn't a veggatarian."
Why do orphans hate Ted Bundy? Cause he's the most wanted.
Why can't an emo person be in charge of sky diving?
He won't deploy the parachute.
Don't be racist! BE LIKE MARIO!
He's an Italian plumber, created by the Japanese, who speaks English, and looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew.
I never knew the kid at school had autism. I always just thought he was walking into cobwebs.
I got a roommate. He killed a butterfly, and I said no butter for a week. The next day, he killed a cockroach. Son of a bitch, nice try.
Jesus can’t judge gay people, because he got nailed before he died.
Why did the male orphan decide to be gay?
Because he wanted someone to call "daddy."
Todoroki POV: All he can think about is Deku.
What do you call James Bond when he’s taking a bath?
Bubble 07.
Why can’t Santa have kids?
He only cums once a year.
How did Michael Jackson die?
Because he danced like a zombie!
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
For he can be wanted.
When God created mankind, he said, "Damn it! One is off color, the other yellowish. The last one is burnt!"
The Mexican landscaper came to cut our lawn. My mom was happy then asked him, "Can I have some of your burrito?" He said, "Yeah." I said, "Whatever."
A few minutes later, my mom told me to cut the lawn. I said, "Why do I have to do it? That's what he's there for." My mom said, "He's going to do the burrito for me." Then I said, "Okay." I finished cutting the lawn and went in the house. I see my mom giving the landscaper a blow job. I said to my mom, "What are you doing?" My mom said, "What does it look like? I'm having my burrito." The landscaper told me that I missed a spot while cutting the lawn.
One day it was me and my sister in the house. My sister said to me, "Let's order food." I said, "We have no money." My sister said, "It's cool; we're just going to order egg rolls from the Chinese store. I know the delivery boy, and he won't charge us." I said, "Cool."
The delivery boy came with the egg rolls. I took some and ate mine in my room. I went back in the kitchen. I see my sister giving the delivery boy a blow job. I ask, "What are you doing?" My sister replied back to me, "You had your egg rolls; let me enjoy mine." Then the delivery boy said, "Don't no charge."
The inventor of the umbrella was just going to call it "brella," but he hesitated.
What happened to the guy who tried to catch fog?
He mist.
