This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
Why was the orphan so successful? They said "go big or go home," but he could not do the second.
My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.
Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.
The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...
Why is the orphan failing all his classes? He can't do homework.
What did God say when he made the Black human? Oh no, I burnt another one!
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.
His hairline doing the moonwalk. Oh, I forgot, he doesn’t even have a hairline.
Why did Michael Jackson allow little boys to sleep in his house? Because he's bad.
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
I called an orphan Spiderman because he's "no way home."
I put a guy in a fridge. He said, "I had a nightmare!"
I went for a swim in the river that crosses Mexico, and I saw a Mexican, aka a wetback, swimming across. I asked, and he said, "I'm a wetback."
There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”
My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.
My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.
My friend called me a dick earlier. I said, "You are what you eat." He then proceeded to run away from me.
A boy went to a genie and said, "I want to be like Batman."
He went home, his parents weren't there.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
He is so fast that he broke the internet for the whole world when he ran.
