Gestation jokes

Yo mama so slow, she took nine months to make the joke. Thank god mine only took 6.

I was about to make a baby joke but then decided to abort.

What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?

They both are thinking, "Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!"

Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congrats," but none of them touch the man's penis and say "well done?"

Babies can spread a nasty smell,

especially when you haven't fed them for a month.

A lot of things have changed since I got my girlfriend pregnant.

My name, my address, and my phone number.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.

Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.

Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.

But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.