Exile jokes

My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like.

"Hey, today was great."

"What happened?"

"I ran into my ex today."

"What's so great about that?"

"I was in my car."

Today was a terrible day. My ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.

But no one would do it.

I broke up with my girlfriend, so I stole her wheelchair, and guess who came crawling back.