Em jokes
A lady runs into a police station and yells, "Help, help! I've been graped!"
A police officer says, "Do you mean raped?"
The girl then replies, "No, there was a bunch of 'em!"
How do you say "Brazier" in German?
Stop 'em from floppin' (German accent)
Orphan jokes are like families, not everyone gets 'em.
(Also, I banged ya mum ;))
Where did Michael Jackson go to college?
Bring 'em young.
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
"Dees nutz, got 'em!"
I don't know what an HD is, but my doctor says I have 80 of 'em'.
My family chastises me for MY job, but you should hear how my family provides "customer service" at their jobs. My mother works as a social worker and answers the phone like, "DYFS, you beat em, we treat em." My grandmother is a Medical Examiner and she answers the phone like, "City Morgue, you kill em, we chill em." These bitches have no class! I'm an actress and studio secretary. When you call the studio, I answer the phone professionally like, "Good afternoon. IHOP, International House Of Pussy. Creampie Cassie speaking."
Why do vegans hate sex?
They don't want to say they had a meat in 'em.
What’s the difference between a woman and a policeman? One of them have rights.
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
Clap em sis!
Why can’t the emo play in trees? They’ll leave ‘em hanging.
Why don't orphans go to Family Dollar? They don't have a family to go with 'em.
Hit 'em with the 1, 2, Jeffery Dahmer!
Girls are like numbers squared. If they're under 13, just do 'em in your head.
Papyrus: Sans! I heard that a HUMAN has fallen!
Sans: And you gotta bone to pick with 'em?
Ring.. Ring.. Yes this is Dave from the Orphanage, "you make 'em we take 'em", how may I be of service?
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell 'em to clap until their parents come home.
Look, an orphan, let's go beat 'em up.