How does Moses prepare his tea? – Hebrews it.
I was going to buy a pocket calculator. But then I thought, who cares how many pockets I have.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? - Of course. The Empire State Building can’t jump.
How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? – Just Juan.
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? – A stick.
What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.
What did the Indian boy say to his mother as he left for school? – Mumbai!
What’s green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? – A pool table.
Do all black people have a problem with slavery? Or just mine?
How does NASA organize a party? – They planet.
What’s the difference between Batman and a black guy?
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
My boyfriend came over today and stole my milk. How dairy.
I know a woman who owns a taser. – She’s stunning!
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? – “Bison.”
He: “Do you smoke after sex?”
She: “I don’t know. I’ve never looked.”
Two antennas got married on a roof. The ceremony was horrible but the reception was great!
I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift, but I couldn’t find a manual.
Why can’t college students take exams at the zoo? – Too many cheetahs!
Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? – He took a day off.
What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?
Boeing boeing boeing.