DoS jokes
Where do you take your pig to karate?
The pork chop class!
What do you call a tree 🌲 that is magic? A magic tree 🌳.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Pssh.
Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bullshit?
Treon: How did you find that?!
Kariana: It was under the cabinet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabinet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!
Petina: Now what have we told you about going into things that are not yours!
Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth, now who is Faineni? Where is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABINET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!
Treon: We can't!
Kariana: BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!
I was wearing a mask and told the teacher I ate her vagina. She said what? I pulled my mask down and said, "No, I said I like your hyenas." Then a kid sees me do it, but he only heard the first part, so he goes up to the teach and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight." She said, "Pull your mask down," and he pulls his mask down and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight."
Memes
What do you call the most fucking racist and obnoxious country in the fucking entire fucking omniverse? NORTH AMERICA!
And if you disagree just 'cus you're American, I don't give a fuck, you low life cunts. Plus, if you don't think you're racist, um, hello people? Motherfucking George Floyd!
What do you call a burnt retard?
Tomato
What do you call a black man with a gun? A gangsta.
We all know the joke: Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.
But do you know why 9 is scared of 7?
Because you are supposed to eat 3 square meals a day (3 squared).
Well, it really do be like it shouldn't, but it is.
What do dogs do that trees don't do?
Answer: They bark!
badoom ching
Why do people eat bananas? Because it's a-peeling!
Do you like doors?
Yes, because you are adoorable.
What do you get when an American talks to an Aussie and a Kiwi?
Two Aussie.
Him: I work with animals all day.
Her: Awwww what do you do?
Him: I'm a pornstar.
What do you call a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bill Cosby?
Predator.
How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.
Boss: Can I do a reference check?
Me: I don’t have a...
*sensei appears*
Me: oh no
Sensei: He was a good student, but he lacked kizma.
Boss: What's kiz...
Sensei:😈
Me: Oh no, here we go.
Sensei: Kizma AS-
Why do people consume "Laxatives"?
Answer: So that they can take a "Shit", STUPID!
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.