DoS jokes
Q: What do you call a nosy pepper?
A: Jalapeño business!
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They can't see their parents.
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
Why do orphans eat their cereal with water?
Their dad never came with the milk.
Why do I love a block? Because I can fall off the stairs.
Memes
Why do orphans never use other people's Wi-Fi?
So they can be connected.
Me in the middle of the night boiling water.
Me talking to my brother: How do you make holy water?
My brother: How?
Me: You boil the hell out of it.
Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted!
How do you break an orphan's wall in their room in the orphanage?
Tell them to put a tally on the wall with a pen for every second their parents are missing.
Why do orphans prefer IKEA to the Home Depot?
Because the Home Depot provides supplies for *a* home. IKEA just provides furniture.
A girl's pussy is a muff, and when we have something against our mouths, they say our voice is muffled, so do I think the origin of the word "muffled" is talking while eating muff?
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Wait, they don't have any.
What do an orphan's parents and Nemo have in common?
They both can't be found.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
What do you call a cannibal without any eyes? A cann-bal :)
I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.
I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.
What do you call a group of kangaroos? Gangaroos.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I tell you, you look pretty, but all you do is look like a poo.
Mom: Hey you! What are you doing?!
Me: Nothing, why?
Mom: You're supposed to do your ______.
Me that/every night: *sob*
Friends: Are you okay?
Me: Yeah, fine.
Me in head: Or maybe I'm not okay...
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? Because there is no Mother's or Father's Day.