DoS jokes
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait........
You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?
Wait..........
Me: Hey, do you live in the ocean?
Random guy: Why?
Me: Because you look like a whale.
What do 9/11 and 911 have in common?
They're twins.
What did the mama nut say to her son?
âIf I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.â
What do you call a nut with a hairy upper lip?
A mustach-io!
Memes
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
What does a kid do when he's bored and he's sitting? He puts wheels on the chair and makes it a wheelchair.
What do you call a fish and a guitar?
Tunafish.
What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?
Family photo.
What do I think about the Kennedy assassination?
First of all, he should have had a roof on that car.
How do ghosts cry?
Boo hoo.
How do demons cry?
ERCDVHVXRCDHGHDCFHBGFBHGN FGEHJGNVEGHDNES BGEWYSHGBEWHGSGNBDGEBSHNZAGCHNSNGEHSNGVHGNNEBDSVZHGB.
Period: Guess whoâs back... back again...
Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?
Period: I can come back in 9 months?
Me: Keep fucking singing.
So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend, "Is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three nails?" Oh wait, I wasnât even Jesus, heâs not doing the T post that he invented.
What do you call staring stares?
Stares.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: It doesnât matter; it wonât come anyway.
How do you stop a school shooter from killing you?
Tell him you donât believe in dog.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Who do you see over there???
What do dead people and orphans have in common? They can't see their family.
What do you call an orphan who takes a selfie?
A family portrait!
What do you need an apple because you got an "izzy?"