DoS jokes
What do you call a retard?
"Kahin."
How do Chinese people name their children?
They drop a tin can down a flight of stairs and call them the sound that's made.
Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.
The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.
"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."
"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."
The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.
"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."
What do you call a nasty ass boy?
Sam Caithness.
How do you close a cabinet?
You closet! Hahahhyaahhahaaahhahaha!
Memes
What did Eminem do when he couldn't get some of his mom's spaghetti?
Well, he didn't make it back to recovery this time...
A nun went to the pub and ordered a gin. The bartender said to her, "I thought nuns weren’t allowed to drink?" and she said, "Not usually, but I am doing the bishop a favor."
The bartender then asked if she was coming to the music evening, and she said, "No, I am with the bishop tonight."
That moment when you realize you do not have a joke and someone ends up laughing at what you still wrote anyway.
People often ask me what I would do for a Klondike bar. Well, I'd straight up put 5 hijackers on Flight 175 before it departed from Logan Airport at 8:14 a.m. on September 11, 2001.
What do you call a kid in a hot tub?
Vegetable soup.
What do you get when you cross a rooster with a small dog?
Why can't Chinese do anything? The government won't let them.
What do you call a bad bull?
A bully.
What do you call a dog with no tail?
A tail-less dog.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What do you call an Italian with an anesthetic?
Ruberto
How do you cook macaroni? With a shark-spoon-a-rooni!
If Stephen Hawking had a heart attack, do you take him to PC World or A&E?
What do orphans use to make breakfast? My ass! 🤣🤣
What do you call a school bus driver that keeps going to sleep? A monster.