DoS jokes
Why did your dad FUCKING LEAVE YOU? He went to suck balls.
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She gagged.
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Ho Lee Fuk.
What should you do after banging the tightest pussy?..
Just put the diaper on her π
How do you think Julius Caesar killed his enemies?..
With a pair of Caesars! πππ
We love Russia, we do.
We love Russia, we do.
We love Russia, we do.
Oh, Russia, we love you! π·πΊ
Memes
What do you call a cat with a live in doctor?
An anemic, shrivelled cat with desperate attached owners.
What takes knowledge to do and also takes knowledge away?
Looking down the barrel and pulling the trigger. π
My mom said the only way to cure depression is to do what she does. She's dead.
What do you call your mom?
My wwwwiiiiiifffffffeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!@#$%
Do not roast. *sigh in depression*
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.
Stranger: Do you want a lollipop?
Kid: No, I hate lollipops, so yeah, and you are not my daddy.
Why do Japanese people hate iPhones? Because they're scared that American airdrops will fall on them.
Yeah, she said, "Do you love me?" I said, "Only partly. I love my bed and my mommy. I'm sorry."
Why are there no guns in China? They might do some "ting wong!"
What do emo kids scan at the store? Their wrist.
What do you call nuts on a chin?
My penis in your mouth.
What do lovely men and tampons have in common?
Both lick up the juices of the women they were made for.
Why do planets circle the sun?
'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.
What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?
Parallel Parkinson's.