DoS jokes
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap it on the arse and tell it to keep going!
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
What do you call a racist community? America.
Who do you call in times of a marriage crisis?
A prostitute, because your wife fucking sucks.
A Russian, a Cuban, and an Englishman are on a ship. The Russian takes a swig of vodka and throws the bottle overboard. The Cuban and Englishman with astonishment say to the Russian, "What did you do that for?"
The Russian says, "In Russia, we got an unlimited supply of vodka."
A little while later, the Cuban lights up a cigar, takes a puff, and throws it overboard. The Cuban says, "We got an unlimited supply of Cuban Cigars in Cuba."
Then the Englishman grabs a Paki and throws him overboard...
Memes
"We are trans. We are Gay. We are lesbian. We are Bi."
We Do Not Care.
Why do you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
How do you fit a baby in a glass?
A blender.
How do you get it out?
Explosives!
How do you confuse a ginger?
Throw a cross at them.
What flavor ice cream do rape victims enjoy?
Cock flavor.
Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A: Lickalotofpuss.
What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!
What do you call a fantastic goat?
Goatastic! So funny please like.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotopuss
Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.
I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"
Who do you call someone that steals his brother's girlfriend and [is] disowned by his whole family? Brandon.
Why do cheetahs run?
Why not?
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid.
Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. Little Johnny always takes the nickel.
One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?”
Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”
How do you die from Alzheimer's? You forget how to breathe.