DoS jokes
What dessert do you get on September 11th?
An ice cream flight!
Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?
She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?
A: Cowacat
B: Mooore
C: Cowacatfood
Memes
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Neither of them can see their parents.
Why was the orphan so successful? They said "go big or go home," but he could not do the second.
Why do women rub their eyebrows? They don't got balls to scratch!
What do chicken on a plancha and emos have in common?
They both are hung.
What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.
Why do orphans suck at baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!
What do you call a graveyard full of disabled people?
A cabbage patch.
Your hairline has a huge path between it, looks like Moses had something to do with it.
What do you call an IT teacher that touches his students?
A PDF file.
What do you call a kid who sings well?
Melodic Minor.
There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”
What do you call seagulls that fly over the bay? Bagels.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Because they actually came back...