DoS jokes
What do you call a eatable door?
- Coriander š
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator ;)
Q: Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?
A: Because they're Santa's Starbucks!
A letter to all Math:
Dear Math,
Grow up and solve your own problems!
2x6= DO IT YOURSELF!!!!
That's what you do. And the ahteot09oe.
Memes
Why do orphans go to church so they can call someone "father?"
I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said no, "Why the fuck would I adopt you?" and I said "I'm gonna kill myself," and she also said, "Make sure you do it right this time."
How do people with hydrocephalus wear standard-size helmets?
What do you call a dog that fell into the Porta-Potty?
A Corgi Potty.
What do you call a no "r"-med T-rex?
A T-ex.
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
Q: Why do Skeletons hate the cold?
A: It sends chills up their spine.
What do you call a male ladybug?
Trans.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
What do you call a person that guards a Samsung store?
A Guardian Of The Galaxy :)
Why do golfers always bring a spare pair of pants?
Because they always get a hole in one!
How did Steven Hawking die?
He blew a fuse doing an update.
Friend: Hey, did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kaneās, because Kane's is amazing! What did you do this weekend? I did-
Me: Dude, are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I donāt give a fuck about what you say.
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What do you call a Mongolian swindler?
A Khan artist.