DoS jokes
Why do people never kick their own balls?
Because they might lose one!
Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?
So they can climb a fence easier.
How do you get a baby in a box? With a blender.
What do you say to a black midget?
Wanna a shower? You look like you got splashed by a muddy puddle.
What do cheetahs like?
Sports!
Memes
What would you do if you were killed?
What do you call an Argentinian with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
Math Teacher: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"
Student: "A drinking problem."
Why do cops never put orphans in jail?
Because they aren't wanted.
"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.
So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"
What do you get when you cut an onion?
Onion jizz.
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it's white and all over their land.
What do you call a teen wizard who just went through puberty?
Hairy Potter.
How do you fit 3 gay men on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
Why do emo kids drink only herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.
"Fuck you, do something about it!"
How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs?
You move the chairs.
Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?
Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
What do a circle and a sphere have in common?
They're round, and round is a shape.