DoS jokes
If two stoners get married, do they have joint assets?
What does 9 and 36 add up to?
A life in prison.
"This vacuum sucks!"
Vacuum: "Yes, I do."
Why do women have no need for umbrellas? Because it doesn't rain in the kitchen.
What do you call an orphan that sings a solo?
Memes
Why can orphans give all you people posting all these stupid orphan jokes over and over again a good kick in the face?
Well, what are you gonna do, tell their parents?
P.S. Stop posting stupid orphan jokes over and over again.
What do you call a foot that got beaten at everything?
De-feeted (Defeated)
So, I was laying in bed and it's winter, so my room is always cold because the heater doesn't work.
And I was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then I laughed because who would wanna be with me. Hahaha
Why do orphans like milk so much?
Because they got no milk as a baby.
What do you call a white girl who can run faster than her brothers?
A redneck virgin.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Why do orphans have dry cereal?
Because they're still waiting on the milk.
The other day I was in the park and got bored, so I found an orphan and punched him in the face, laughed at him, and said, "Whatcha gonna do, tell your parents?"
A man walked into the kitchen and asked his blonde wife what she was doing. She said, "I'm trying to do this jigsaw puzzle. It's supposed to be a tiger, but all of the pieces are brown." Her husband then said, "Honey, those are frosted flakes."
How do you get a baby to stop crying?
Simple... you staple its mouth shut.
What do you call an old snowman that survived till summer?...
Water... yup, water...
What do you call a person with a hole in their shoe?
A Christian.
What do you call AG?
A beta male.
How do you open a banana? Answer with a mon-key.
What kind of pictures do turtles take?
Shelfies.