DoS jokes
What do bananas wear into battle?
Banana-rama!
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
Because they'll get a hole in one!
Me: Hey! Do you know how to tie a knot?
Person: Yea, why?
Me: Cause I need help tying this noose :)
What do you call a child predator and an illegal immigrant? Alien vs. Predator.
What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Memes
How do u catch a tame rabbit?
The tame way.
What do you call a toothless bear?
A gummy bear.
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they don't have a mother's or father's day.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
How do you fit 1000 babies in a swimming pool?
A blender.
How do you get them out? Slurp them up with a straw.
Q: What do you call an angry monkey?
A: Furious George!
When do you go on red and stop at green?
A watermelon.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
What do cows listen to?
Moo-sic.
What do you say when a Spanish person loses a car?
Carlos.
In the new Grinch, the Whos would say he stole Christmas, "Get him!" Then the Grinch said, "I'm an orphan!" That changes everything. The Whos said, "What would they do if Max was an orphan?"
Why do people always tell actors to break a leg?
Because every play has a cast.