DoS jokes
Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?
Because they want to feel wanted.
What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?
There's no Jack!
My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."
What do fish smoke? A puffer.
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
Memes
What do super fancy music conductors wear?
A Louis baton.
What do you call two AI systems that are in love with each other? Member of chat LGBT.
What do you call a terrorist swimming?
A bath bomb!
I’m in a wheelchair and I can do stand-up comedy, oh wait...
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Both can't see their parents.
What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?
Sex worker.
Why do orphans not know if they're lactose intolerant?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
An old man and a child are walking into the woods. Suddenly, they stop.
"Mister," the child says, "I'm scared, these woods are dark and creepy..."
The old man says, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone!"
Alright, what do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
Why do orphans always become criminals?
Because they want to feel wanted.
Why do orphans always come back?
Because I love cock.
What do you call a living Panera Bread?
Panera Breath.
This is not a joke, but if your uncle tells you, "Bend over, touch your toes, I'll show you where the monster goes," don't do it, hehehehehe.
What do you call it when a gorilla bumps uglies with an orangutan?
Monkeypox.
What do you call it when a bunch of guys who look the same have an orgy?
A doppelgangbang.