Why was the Cheetah not allowed to do tests?
Because it always cheated.
DoS Jokes
I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"
I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.
What do you call an elite bungee jumper? An emo kid.
What's white and annoying at breakfast? An avalanche.
Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She got hit by an axe.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.
Do you know what a reverse exorcism is?
It's when the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
Do you know the phrase, "One man's trash is another man's treasure?" Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Do you know why dead baby jokes are always funny?
They never get old.
What do you call a selfie taken by an orphan?
A family portrait.
What pizza 🍕 do you order for Christmas?
Cheeses Crust!
My mother told me to be positive, but she said that when I was going to do an AIDS test.
What do emos use as birth control?
Their personalities!
How do lions 🦁 like their steak?
"Roar!"
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?
Something big and warm 🍆.
Why do orphans dip their Oreos in milk?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
(Answer) Ground beef.
Sorry for a bad joke.
If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.
Why do orphans get in trouble at school?
Because the school doesn't have any parents to report to.
