DoS jokes
What do orphans not see on a controller?
The home button.
What do you call an accomplished opera singer with recurring gonorrhea?
Standing ovation!
Quoting the great Jimmy Carr: "When I cook, I make sure there are vegetarian options. They can make do, or they can fuck off."
Q: What do you get when the cow jumped over the barbed wire? A: Udder destruction!
What do you call Canadian weed? Canadabis.
Memes
Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
How do you trap a shape? You use a trapezoid.
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
Do you want to hear a building joke?
I am still working on it.
You have been accused of stealing toilet rolls. How do you plead?
Guilty or not guilty?
What does a nosy pepper do? Gets JALAPEÑO BUSINESS!
How do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
Where do smart hotdogs end up?
On the honor roll!
What do you call an orphan in Alabama?
A virgin.
What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?
A crab apple!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! (aka dinner)
What did the bee say to the flower?
"Hey bud! When do you open?"