DoS jokes
What do you call a Hippie's Wife? A Mississippi.
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
How do you make an elephant float?
One elephant, two scoops of ice cream, and a lot of root beer!
What time do you call me tomorrow?
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
Memes
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
What do astronauts 👩‍🚀 do when they’re on break?
They eat launch. 🚀🥪
Why do orphans always go to church? Because that’s the only place they could call someone "father."
Why do basketball players love cookies so much?
Because they can dunk them!
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong.
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Car-los
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
How do you punish Helen Keller? Just move the couch.
Chuck Norris trained Dude Perfect how to do it.
How do you drown a Blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker in a pool.
What do dogs do when they lose their tail?
They go to the retail store.
Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?
The adult person I asked: Cereal?
Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?
The person: Yes.
Me: WHAT?!!!??!!
How do you confuse a blonde?
Put her in a square room and tell her to run in a circle.