DoS jokes
Q: Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: They come back, unlike their parents.
2 weeks here.
What do dicks and popsicles have in common?
They both like to be sucked on, and they sometimes choke you.
What do turtles use to communicate?
A shellphone!
It is now legal to bully an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"
I said, "Paper."
She said, "Really?"
I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"
Memes
What do you call Stephen Hawking on pot?
Pot wheels.
Don't you hate it when you do the dishes, but then you realize it wasn't the dishes?
Why do orphans go to church?
Because it's the only place where they get to call him "father."
Why do orphans go to church?
It’s the only place they can call someone “father.”
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."
What do you call a magic owl? Hoo-dini.
I have a ton of work to do... A skele-TON.
What did the cops do when 600 hares escaped the zoo?
The cops had to comb the area.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put it in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner!
What do you call a fat fortune teller? A four-chin teller.
My friend: What are you doing?
Me: I'm making holy water.
My friend: How?
Me: I'm boiling the hell out of it.
Do you want to hear a joke about pizza?
Wait, no. It's too CHEESY!
What do you call a pig that knows karate?
Pork-chop!
What do you call nitrogen in the day? You call it day-trogen!
Do you know why Peter Pan is always flying?
Because he Neverlands!